Back home it’s probably snowing, a typical Maryland winter. Thinking of this, I smile. The sun is beating down on me as I walk down the busy southern California street. A special occasion has brought my family across the country, in a few days my brother will be getting married. My two older sisters and I are bridesmaids. And tonight is the rehearsal dinner.
My brother, Danny, has always sort of been interesting and a little crazy and I expected his wedding to be much the same. My expectations were confirmed when he showed up to the rehearsal dinner in his Looney Tunes tie.
The day of the wedding has arrived and Danny stands by the altar with his sword. Yes…he has a sword. The groomsmen begin walking down the aisle and the spectators in the pews can’t help but smile. All of the groomsmen are dressed up as different characters. There’s Indiana Jones, a Viking, a cowboy, a knight. And then the ring bearer begins his walk, or I guess I should say trot, down the aisle. The ring bearer is actually a faun, half man, half goat prancing daintily to the front of the church. How my brother persuaded one of his friends to do this, I’m not sure.
Towards the end of the ceremony, I take a look around. I see a Jedi, a ninja, a faun. And I see my brother, now a married man. As crazy as it was, his wedding reflected his personality perfectly.
Word Count: 250
Point: Everything in life does not have to be serious.
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The detail in your story is great, but sometimes it felt like there was a little too much. My only suggestion is that you place more of an emphasis on the point of the story. Maybe you could say something about how a wedding is supposed to be a serious day near the beginning of your narrative. Overall, you did a good job with showing rather than telling the reader what happened.
ReplyDeletei like the story. show more in the story you're point. people might read and and not know the point you are trying to make without you saying it.
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